Sitting in my jammies in front of the fire while watching TV. It has been a long day but not a bad one. Tears have flowed off and on all day. Everything I am doing is related to Tom's death. I am looking for a house, dealing with credit errors, taking care of insurance issues, etc... None of these would be if he were still here. Well - the credit error would be but I probably wouldn't know about it. It is painful.
I did find a house that I wanted and put an offer in. Hopefully we can get it all together and get me moved out of this house with the new year. I love this house - but I can't afford it without Tom and it reminds me so much of him. We chose the ceiling fans together, the tiles on the floors, the paint on Mom's bedroom walls. It is all part of Tom. We sat forever figuring out which cabinets to buy. Which one's got pullouts and which didn't. It was a stressfull but wonderful time. Now - it's over and I am troubled trying to accept it.
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